Who on earth is reading my blog? My apologies because I have writers block

I seem to have a steady flow of people reading my blog for the last month, I am not sure who you are cause no one leaves me  a comment. No need to be shy now kids.

But my apologies because I feel like I have got writers block since I have been  here. Stemming from the fact that I have not been paying attention to current affairs and therefore have no material to write about. I am still struggling to think of a fabulously witty slogan to put on the back of  a wicked camper van.

But to my new readers I hope you do not become bored, I have plenty of past ramblings to keep you entertained until I regain soberness. And we can continue to get to know each other every day in a fashion that is both friendly and yet full of sexual promise.

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I Have Writers Block So I’m Just Going To Say It

We all face it as bloggers and/or writers.  A blank page, staring back at you, mocking you.  “Haha, you can’t think of anything to write on me.”, I can hear the page saying.  “Bastard piece of paper!  Why won’t you let my thoughts stain your emptiness!?“, I ponder.

The oddity of this phenomenon is that each and every time we prepare a post, article, or whatever you want to call it, we start with a blank page.  So why can’t we transfer our thoughts through the tips of our fingers onto the keyboard every time?

Over the course of the last 48 hours, I’ve been attempting to tell my readers something special that happened to me last Friday.  I wrote, deleted, and started over again.  I must have done this three times before I decided to walk away.  And after a 20 minute break to gather my thoughts, I was at it again; only to write, delete, and start over again.  Again, this repetitious behavior started after an hour break this time.  And again, I achieved the same results.

My plan was to write a touching, heartfelt post about how I had spent the last 5 years of my life working my butt off to become a network administrator.  I also planned to include the fact that I was leaving my very well-established eight year military career behind, in order to attempt a career in information technology.  Furthermore, I was going to add in the facts that my wife and I welcomed two babies into the world, maintained our full-time jobs throughout the four years I was studying, and all the things she sacrificed to help me pursue my education and “dream job”.

And I wasn’t going to stop there.  I was going to explain to my readers that I was the last member of my immediate family to obtain my Bachelor degree, and how I had pursued and successfully passed multiple information technology certification tests while we were raising our three children and studying for my Bachelor degree.  And I wasn’t going to let my readers forget that my military job was that of a military policeman and not anything related to information technology.

I was going to go on and tell my readers how after searching on-line for a job for four to five hours a day for 2 1/2 months that I finally got an interview.  Then I was going to continue by telling them I landed my first IT job as a support technician in July 2010.

After I was through discussing that, I was going to tell my readers that after five long years of busting my rump which included staying up late finishing papers, working night shift for my new company, going from a Staff Sergeant in the military with ten subordinates all the way back down to the bottom of the totem pole, and my wife sacrificing her sanity and everyday life for me, that I was informed last Friday I was selected as the newest network administrator for my company.

To conclude, I was going to attempt to explain how proud of myself I was, how proud of my wife I was for her support, and how exhilarating the feeling of completing a five year goal felt like.  I had finally done it.  I finally achieved my goal of becoming a network administrator.

But for whatever reason, I just could not get that on “paper”.  I tried and tried again, only to fail over and over again.  I have writers block so I’m just going to say it…

…I got promoted to Network Administrator last Friday!!

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Do I have writers block?

So, I have hit a tiny wall…  fucking writers block.

I relate this to the fact that I have gotten back on my psych meds and am currently considering not taking them for fear that I may never be inspired again.  Words used to flow out of me like water and now I find myself looking different random places for inspiration.  I’m not sure how to deal with this and the only reason the words are coming out me now is because I haven’t taken them today.  Coincidence?  I’m not convinced.  After all, Elizabeth Wurtzel (Prozac Nation) is an accomplished writer and is medicated for depression.  However, I recently read a blog in which the writer mentions all the poets and novelists that were clinically depressed and either killed themselves or suffered in silence.  Am I that person?  I am constantly wrestling with this.  My depression has always been so comforting.  It’s the one thing that I can rely on.  It’s always there for me when I need it.  The one emotion that I recognize a mile away.  Happiness doesn’t come as often as it probably should given that I have all my limbs and my eyesight and two jobs that make it affordable for me to drink on the reg and afford expensive sunglasses.  And food… and there’s that shelter thing too.  Maybe I have more to be thankful for than I pay attention to.  But then, that’s never been my personality.  To see the good in life.

But then again, maybe I don’t want to be happy.  Maybe this wrestling match in my mind is a good thing.  I t causes me to question.  When I was younger, I was raised as an only child and always felt very alone.  However, there were things I found comfort in.  Taking pictures, talking to my stuffed animals hoping that they would come alive and believing that as soon as I slept they would watch over me and dance around like Labyrinth.  I also enjoyed reading and playing with makeup.  Am I rambling?  I’ll stop.

Mmmm… my headphones are playing Billie Holiday.  Only further contributing to the fact that I love depressing music.  She’s all I listen to now.

Also, I had sex with another barely legal with a five pound cock.  I didn’t mean to, but I was hammered and it just happened.  Red wine will do that to me.  The only awkward moment to speak of is that we took a shower together in the morning.  Which is something that I never do.  Shower time is private time.  It’s the only time of the day where I am completely alone.  I do NOT like to share shower time.  But I did with this boy.  He was very sweet as young guys usually are, kissing me, bathing me, playing with my hair.  I’m just glad I shaved my legs.  The last time I had a one night stand I hadn’t taken a sex shower and it is very fucking humiliating to have hairy legs the first time a guy sees you naked.  I do it to prevent myself from having one night stands, but it never fails… I get too drunk to care.  Anyway, back to the boy.  I think I might see him again.  In the biblical sense.  I don’t particularly see any reason why I wouldn’t.  He’s very sweet and knows every word to that dick song by Frankie Avalon… *le swoon*…

Anyway, today is Thanksgiving and the Cowboys lost.  But I had deep-fried turkey for the first time with some great people, so it wasn’t a total loss of the day.  And the night is young… who knows what it holds in store for this little Jew.

 

(Hey, maybe I don’t have a block after all…)

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I Have Writers Block Right NOW

Yeah so I have writers block at this very moment. you might be asking how is it that i’m writing though….I just told myself to write something and something will come to you. So as of right now nothing has came, I’m truly at a lost for words, but how can that be if I am still typing? OK so I guess I will just type these thought racing through my mind. I am thinking about the rent that is due, Internet, directv, cell phone, sigh. I am also thinking about this long ass train ride I am about to partake in. I am also hungry, however as you stand next to me more often you will realize that I am always hungry.

I was also just thinking about how it appears that I am the only one in this library who can type freely, as in, any subject matter. Everyone else looks really serious and miserable, Im listening to Waka Flacka right now. So many different types of people go to this school. I think my stomach is making noises, but I cant hear it because my headphones are loud, why is that funny too me?

Well I am going to get on this train and hopefully I will come up with a better…wait, a subject matter period. I should name this blog “Racing Thoughts”, or ” I Can Not Concentrate. I am going to leave it as is because honestly I was just going to log out and come try again later. But since this what I’ve done, I believe this is what is meant to be. 

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I have acquired a case of writers block…

I have acquired a case of writers block…

I went on a mini vacation to visit my family and left my brain…and my ability to write…and think…and speak in California. I am ok though it has not effected my ability to garden or pull weeds or plant seeds or nap.

On another note: Thank god for USPS! My seed catalogues arrived. I have been drooling ever since.

The drooling isn’t this bad but it could be. 

The End. I am glad we had this talk.

Em

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I Have Writer’s Block

I’ve had pretty bad writer’s block for a few days now. It feels like my brain is simply… dry. That, and I keep getting very distracted by people wanting to talk to me.

So I figure that the best way to get rid of my writer’s block is to write about how I have writer’s block. Actually,  I don’t think that’s going to help at all.

I’m trying to write critical thinking 101 type stuff for Teen Skepchick but if I detail critical thinking as much as I’d like to it would make an exceptionally long post so I’ve been trying to break it down into basic stuff (questioning things, demanding evidence, fallacies, good and bad reasons) but they keep overlaping onto each other and I’m trying not to make it all intimidatingly too long to read.

It’s really not working.

And now I don’t know what to say.

I still don’t know what to say.

Space is big.

Maybe it would go away if I started typing in another language.

Hola. Me llamo es Elles. Me gusta ciencias.

I’m thinking of going to do some math problems but I don’t think my brain can do math if it can’t write. Oh, this inability to think about explaining critical thinking is going to drive me mad. Then I can be a mad scientist!

You know, I’d like for there to be fewer mad scientists in science fiction. I wish for once, just once…

I still feel all dry. I’mma go get some sleep methinks.

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Help! I Have Writer’s Block

We have had a very busy summer here in Ohio. Between playground playgroup, cookouts, graduation parties, out of town guests, and the everyday crazy that is life around here, I haven’t had much time for writing. Now I’m out of the habit and am finding hard to get back onto the blogging bandwagon.

I have so many ideas in my head, but can’t seem to get them onto the page/post.

I would love to hear suggestions as to what you do to get over your writer’s block. Please, help a fellow blogger out here.  

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I Almost Forgot to Have Writer’s Block

I’m getting frustrated with this writer’s block thing.  It’s getting on my nerves.  I’m trying to force myself to post daily in the hopes that something will give and I’ll suddenly find my missing voice under some dusty, old thoughts in my head, or something, but what’s happening is, I’m just coming here and sitting with a blank page in front of me for hours a day and getting nowhere fast.  I have had some really good naps out of it, however, and naps are always good.

This writer’s block will break.  I know it will.  Maybe not today but if I keep at it, eventually, I won’t be able to shut myself up.  I can’t wait.  I love the sound of my fingers tapping on the keyboard as fast as I can think.

One of the best things I’ve done is this post a day challenge.  I haven’t posted much but forcing myself to post something helps.  What really helps is that I’m not alone in this.  I’ve visited and been visited by other’s taking this post a day challenge and it really helps when someone comments or likes my posts.  I honestly enjoy reading the posts of other people who are also participating.  Most of them are doing better than I am at actually writing about things other than writer’s block.

Every time I read another post by someone participating in the challenge I feel excited for them and I think to myself, “see, they managed to post and it’s good and the world didn’t come to a screeching halt.  Surely you can post something and everything will be OK.”

Every day that goes by, and this is day eleven, I get a little closer to busting out of writer’s block.  One of these days pretty soon, I’m going to visit someone else’s blog and be so inspired by something that I forget to have writer’s block anymore.  I can’t wait!

Over at Mo's Blog,  Mo had the idea to start a blogroll.  Genius!  Why didn’t I think of that?  I’m going to put up a blogroll too.  Thanks for the great idea, Mo.

I actually have a story to tell for tomorrow.  I asked my youngest daughter (23) what favorite family story I should write about.  She suggested a story from my childhood that I have told several times.  It’s a great story.  Again, why didn’t I think of that?

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I Have Writer’s Block!!!

Maybe cause I’m easily distracted.  Maybe cause all I want to do lately is see flops at the poker table — by the way, did anybody catch the Main Event winner last night?  Twenty-two years old and nine million richer.  Why can’t that be me?  I don’t even need the nine million.  I’d be happy with five.  See, already talking about another topic instead of my writer’s block issue…

Maybe it’s because I just look forward to seeing what new apps I can buy on my new iphone.  Did I mention I got a new iphone by the way?  Thanks to a certain someone I’m now connected to the world 24/7… well except when I’m on the metro… or in elevators… or in underground parking garages… okay, so maybe I’m not connected 24/7 but still it’s pretty cool…

Or maybe it’s cause I’m just a procrastinator as of late.  Really?  Have I become a procrastinator?  I mean I know I’ve been putting off working out lately and maybe I should be doing work, work, instead of writing this blog entry, but I mean screenwriting… screenwriting is my passion, right?

No, that can’t be it…

It’s definitely writer’s block.

Either way, I just can’t seem to be able to write anything lately.  Witty?  Nope.  Creative?  Nope.  Funny?  I think that answer is obvious just by reading this post. I mean, I’m even struggling to write this dribble.  I started this post at 11 something and already it’s almost time for lunch.  Speaking of lunch, I’m starving.  Maybe, I should go right now… but if I go now, then the rest of my day after lunch is longer as opposed to if I wait and go later.  The dilemmas of everyday life… wait, what was I writing about??

Oh that’s right, so I’ve been working on this script for my class and I’m completely lost… and I’m only on page five. The books and writing gurus say by page ten, the genre has to be clear, the main question has to be posed, and above all it’s got to be interesting.

FAIL. FAIL. FAIL.

I haven’t even introduced all the main characters let alone the plot.  Do I even know what the plot is?  Do I even know what I want to write about?   Guess, I should start answering these questions and fast, since this is all due tomorrow.  Looks like it’s going to be a long day.

Man I’m starving…

Maybe I should eat lunch now?

Yeah, that sounds about right.

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The Challenge Of Writing This Blog

Until I decide otherwise, there aren’t going to be any new blog posts coming up on this blog. However if you have stumbled here, I strongly encourage you to take a look around at the multitude entries in the archives that

Why? Call it the cruelest of ironies, but in writing about “challenges” I myself have succumbed to a pretty tough challenge. That being, the challenge of writing daily blog posts for my own blog and finding satisfaction and enjoyment in doing so. If and when I’ve overcome that significant sense of writer’s block and rediscover that feeling of enjoyment, I will return.

In the meantime, take care.

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still have writer’s block. i

still have writer’s block. i think. bill suggested that “undies, poo, and sex” are always interesting subjects to write about, which is true except harold has already written something about undies, my pooing sessions have been uneventful (nice solid turds, nothing out of the ordinary), and sex is something i hardly know about except for the random tales i overhear from people who think i’m asleep. so i guess i’m up shit creek for a while. but…

i did learn something new today. it turns out that the bananas we eat are hybrids and also sterile. and that bananas are expected to go extinct unless we use some of that fancy genetic engineering. it’s ironic to think that the most phallic fruit (hah! fruit!) is asexual and sterile. sorta like my love life.

and now for something totally random. porn star asia carrera dressed up as winnie the pooh. 

   

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Eff Me I Have Writer’s Block.

There I am. Day 1 of getting back into writing Lila. Pretty excited when I started, but about ten minutes after taking this picture, it started going downhill.

I was in my office, and immediately felt it wasn’t going to work. Surroundings are very important to me when I write. I have to be in the right place. So I unplugged my laptop from it’s office lifelines and walked into the living room.

I sat down on the couch, and started looking at the Word files I had created for Lila in 2005, 2006, and 2008. Fuck me, had it really been that long? Apparently yes, which was kind of a burn, because seriously I am writing basically a short story, not a novel, or even novella…why didn’t I finish this in 2005, 2006, or 2008? Beating myself up instead of writing. Typical.

Ten minutes after that I felt extremely tired. I had to nap. If I have to nap, it means I’m really tired, because really, I never nap. Or I’m avoiding writing.

I woke up cold. Apparently the jacket I pulled over myself while napping wasn’t enough. I got up, grabbed the “fetus” blanket, which is the most amazing $200 I’ve ever spent in my life and wrapped it around myself. It’s this soft, warm, grey blanket so comforting it feels like you’re back in the womb, or what I envision being in a womb must feel like. Safe. No writing.

I walked into the kitchen and tried to decide what I should…drink. You see today is also the first day of my seven-day juice fast. So, no eating. Just drinking. Juice. Maybe this is why I have writer’s block. I don’t think I’ve ever tried to write while juice fasting. I also kinda cheated and dipped a baby spoon into the honey jar, and let the honey melt on my tongue. I’m NOT supposed to have honey on my juice fast. Just juice. And tea. And vegetable broth. So I feel kinda bad about the honey.

I made tea. Some bizarre herbal tea from Poland with pear extract and some herb I can’t pronounce, but maybe the herb wasn’t good for my writer’s block…and I added lemon juice, and honey. I’m NOT supposed to have honey on my juice fast. Fuck.

And then to distract myself further I decided to Skype with my parents, which didn’t go well, because they just bitched about my sister, and about how I need to fly out to Toronto and talk some sense into her. Yet, they won’t pay for my plane ticket and a hotel room. Even though, hello! I have a life and clients, and need to work and write, and really can’t take the time off right now, or afford to take the time off right now. And really, why should I be paying for something THEY want me to do. Not that I don’t want to hang with my sis…

So another really great distraction for writer’s block is writing a blog about my writer’s blog. Yup…kinda a cop out. But whatever, it’s where I’m at.

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I seem to have come down with a bad case of writer’s block.

Is there anything worse than wanting to write but being unable to force any words out of your mind?

Ok, obviously there a million things worse than writer’s block but right now this is the only immediate problem I am facing.

I am not even suffering from the typical ‘being unable to write’ writer’s block, I can not even come up with anything interesting to write about. (Other than my writer’s block clearly, but this can hardly be considered interesting.)

In my head I want to write a novel, but about what? And would I even be able to do it? I believe this is what is stopping me. I keep questioning my abilities, doubting whether I could write anything worthy of reading even if a subject presented itself to me. But how do I overcome this? Google, that’s how.

I have actually stumbled across a ’10 step program’ for battling writer’s block, (I feel like I am in writing rehabilitation). And it just so happens to be that step 6 suggests to; “Write about your anxieties regarding writing or creativity.“ Ironically I had started this rant/recovery attempt before finding this ‘program’ so it seems I had already started helping myself anyway. So perhaps this will help, and then again perhaps not. We’ll see.

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I Have Writers Block

I have writers block on my second post. That is not funny. The first post flowed from my fingers, by the time I was done I thought this would be a breeze every week. All week I kept little notes about things that happened and wrote funny in my head. Then today came, yes Sunday deadline day and nothing is happening. Everyone is waiting,  I think to myself panicking. I have to post something, all four people who read this are waiting…..hmmmmm. Well read on, here is my week.

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I Have Writers Block

In this post I will attempt to break a case of bad writers block. I don’t know where this will go and I don’t know what I am going to write about. Generally I write about politics and religion or something along those lines, but now I intend on writing about what is keeping me from writing. Oh, hang on I have to go put my clothes in the dryer.

That must be it. Life is getting in the way. Putting clothes in the dryer, washing the dishes, cleaning the house, all of those things that get in the way of sitting down and writing about what is going on in the world. Not to mention the stress that goes along with everyday living.

There is this other issue that I’ve been dealing with, my health. I went to the doctor and she basically said that I really need to exercise so that I can stay on a regular sleep schedule. I wasn’t sleeping enough during the week (4-6 hours per night) and I was very tired during the day, so she put me on some vitamins and told me to exercise, and by golly it worked! I’ve been sleeping better and staying awake at work better ever since.

But that time period that I now spend sleeping is the time that I would have normally spent blogging. You know how it is, 2am and you just want to keep writing, not anymore. Now its 12am and I am tired as heck and ready to hit the sack. I’ve got to start adjusting to my new schedule and making things happen.

I hope this didn’t bore anyone, I probably have something to say about current events I just don’t know how to say it. I guess that’s why they call it writers block. I sure hope this worked.

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